Giving up

I am sad today when I realize how many things I have given up in my life. I am not talking about the great opportunities or the big lotteries that were to be won.

I am talking about those brief moments in which I gave up those seemingly small things in a seemingly reasonable way.

Like not spending the Onam of 2009 with my grandfather in the middle of green paddy fields in Palakkad. Of course I have my reasons. Tickets from Bangalore to Palakkad for Onam is sold out 4 months in advance and even if I manage to get a ticket, I ll have to pay twice the price. Oh yeah, one more reason, Onam in Bangalore isn’t bad at all and after all I ve spend about 25 Onams in Palakkad, so change is always good!

Like not being able look into the eyes of Mona Lisa and stay put for a minute. Of course I have a reason. Mona Lisa’s room in Louvre looks like this.

So I tell my wife “I don’t think it is worthwhile to wait for 30 minutes to have a closer look at Mona Lisa. Let’s take distant photograph and file it in our travel diary. After all, we are not people who are into art and as if we understand what Renaissance art really mean!”

Or like not attending the wedding of my close friend. After all, we have not been in regular touch for the last 10 yrs and both of us have taken different routes in life.

I understand that reasons are always valid, true and obvious.

But whenever I think of the happiest and the most fulfilling times of my life, I brushed these reasons aside.